This is a small compilation of some of the wittiest one-liners to have escaped the mouth of Professor Ravichandran (or RaviC as he is known in WIMWI circles), who is one of the sharpest profs I have ever met...He has a great philosophy to his life and work too. The following is a collection by some enthu faccha last year of some of the statements he made in Operations Management class. I will be following up this effort with some of the sparklers I remember from CCCS class this year as well...
On students pretending to go through their material to avoid being cold called:
“You people have a nice way of avoiding me. Whenever I ask a question ... you start looking in your books, as if you are very busy...!”
"Looking away..Like newly married brides"
"This is not your contention but confusion and at best you can have confusion coz it’s your birth right"
“I am stunned by your intellectual inferiority .....”
On the projector being out of focus:
"This is unfocussed...just like the PGP program"
On the
"Here you are jumping up and down like an intoxicated monkey, and you go to the workers and he shrugs and says,' is there a problem?'"
The one in which he explains cycle time:
"Cycle time does not mean that you take three women and expect to have a child in three months, it will still take nine months"
RC: What would you want? Freedom or Air-conditioned Buses?
StratStud Student: Both.
RC: You cannot get both. That would be like having a mistress and a wife. One in
StratStud Student: That's a philosophical question.
RC: There is nothing philosophical about it. It is very materialistic.
On Foreign Students
"... They are real engineers....unlike the Indians!" (Referring to foreigners
In context of the exchange students I guess...)
On self:
"I am a sadistic monkey, u know"
" when my son was 3 years old... yes he actually once was even though he thinks he was born at 15"
“Have taken the responsibility of getting 2 sons into this world...Not that it takes much of an effort..... With some people it might be a problem. But with me.. It didn’t take much effort....... its not very difficult. Provided you get the chance”
In a session on scheduling:
RC: so what should blitz do to correct its schedule?
Student: Sir, it should improve its scheduling policy.
RC: You know, now that’s like going to a doctor and telling him "I'm not well" and asking him what should I do and the joker says "Get well".
On being distracted by a student chewing on his gold chain:
"You are the bottleneck of my attention.....You take my attention away from the class....I should really do something about this"
On a nervous student dropping things from his/her desk and not daring to move a muscle to avoid attracting attention:
“That’s why housekeeping is important in JIT. If your workspace is organized and things are running smoothly you don’t attract any attention..”
“like a pregnant woman constantly craving for something to eat before having a baby??”
Height of cold call: A poor classroom theatre attendant coming in to serve tea in the wrong CR:
RC: “Arre yeh kya humarey liye hai”?
RC helping himself to a cup of tea: “See that’s what happens when you outsource without proper information sharing.”
On averages/mean as a performance measure:
Student : Sir, the queue length is 2.25 people.
RC: 2.25 people? Doesn’t make sense does it?
Student : err…ummm…
RC: That’s like the census of
On asymptotes:
Student : “The function gradually approaches 0…”
RC: “that’s like saying that asymptotically we all die…”
On a student missing from class and the class rep unable to locate him in the dorm:
“So what should we do now??.. Let’s organise a party with band-baaja and go find him…
On the same AWOL student:
RC: “…WIP gone missing”
On scheduling conflicts:
Student: “It arises because of shared resources.”
RC: “You mean like Princess Diana or Draupadi..?”
On asking a student for an example and him/her giving an inappropriate one:
RC: "Which is your favorite LP problem?"
Student
RC: "Adani Wilmar?!?!? Was it an LP problem or a transportation problem??"
Student: "sir there we had to find the optimal route from the ports to the factories by an LP formulation"
RC
Dunno the context:
”Vishwamitra had zero WIP...he had compressed cycle time a long time back”
Ranga
